Morning Routine

Sarah Hohn

English Major—2nd Year

Do you crave coffee? Do you want decaf or regular? Regardless, make sure you put the right amount of grounds in the paper filter. The water heats up and so do you. The hot amber liquid touches your tongue and your lips. It burns. Do you remember the first time you had coffee? You knew that people liked it but you weren’t so sure. It hurt and it burned. You thought it would go away but the hurting and burning stayed. The only difference now is that you need it. You wake up every day and must satisfy your need for coffee. The caffeine makes you feel high. Not for long. When you need it the most, it knocks you back down again. You come off your short-lived high and feel worse than you did before. You wanted it, so you took it. Unfortunately, you didn’t know what you wanted. What you really wanted was breakfast in bed. That warm buttery croissant and freshly washed cherries and soft banana. You thought and you hoped that the pleasure of that breakfast would give you the energy you needed to get through the day. But, you still rely on the empty quick fix of your coffee and its caffeine. Some people like to be sweet. They like to pretend that the coffee is something that it’s not. Something nicer like a soft drink or a milkshake. Fuck a frappuccino. Me? I like my coffee black. I always take it the way it comes. Especially bitter and harsh. It’s almost better if it hurts me. Actually, it IS better when it hurts me. We used to share a cup of black coffee every morning. If I were lucky, you would even give me a spot of cream. Do I even like coffee? Did I even like you? Or did you just fill me up? Did you just give me that quick buzz that caffeine alone used to satisfy? I’m no doctor but dopamine and caffeine have the same effects. If you really want to know, I’m taking a little break from coffee right now. Instead, I will drink tea. Earl Grey or Peppermint, maybe. If I drink enough tea maybe I can even start to meditate. I should probably just go to sleep a little earlier so I don’t wake up craving that coffee so bad.