The Victim's Mind

Temidayo Akogun

English—4th Year

The victim's mind is such that she cannot fully process what it means to be free, she cannot totally embrace the concept of having no limitations, she is unable to completely feel settled with the idea of self will and choice. She sees success and its requirements but she is also challenged with how she has been taught to approach it. She is challenged with what role she plays or perhaps should be playing. And in this moment she reaches behind her for a grasp of familiarity, a grasp of recognition, a reminder that her ancestors did and so she can. Black air. Black cold air. Black cold air of nothingness. The air felt even colder when he said, “We built it, we are the ones who built the world around you, we built everything, the system, the technology, the policies that make you the free woman you are today. We decided that it is better that you now have the right to choose, yet you still complain that it's unfair?” Yet he missed the point and he missed it completely. He belted out those statements within the comfort of his own free mind; his free mind where he could subconsciously reach out and harness the power of his own male ancestors, their opportunities, their bravery, their intelligence and their vigour, he had easy access to the audacity that allowed him to address this generational patriarchal power as “we.”

And so really she couldn't blame him for not seeing it, his possibility did not include the reality of oppression, so she couldn't blame him rather this is what she did; she let her empty grasp fall back to her side and then she looked forward instead for hope and oh, how she held onto it for dear life. She held onto it for the life of the next one to come, for the life of the one in front so that when she would reach behind for her own confidence, support and audacity, she would be met with a warm, maybe tired, but nevertheless, warm strong hand full or both possibility and audacity. Not cold air.